20190309

now, after all these years, the ex wants to do battle.

why? because i'm in a relationship. after almost a decade, i found someone. someone i can love and trust.

all in the guise of wanting more time with m. it's unreal. so here we are, moving just south of the state line, and that is enough.
that is enough to receive threats, demands, and downright nastiness to the point of having to consult an attorney in order to move 10 miles.

she can't stand my choices, while she's remarried (twice), and bought houses, and done the whole dance. she seemingly moved on.

i sure did.

but here, we have a sad excuse for a mom, a sad excuse for a woman, who is vindictive and awful.

for what it's worth, kiddo is tired and confused; she still wants attention from her mom, but realizes this woman just wants to ruin what we have. with every text message, she seeks to chisel away at the family i am building. she actually said she was worried my wife may have more "power" over m than her. Without further adieu, here's the list, verbatim:

My concerns and amendments:
*she will not be moved from X and allowed to graduate 8th grade
* relocating parent will transport child, at minimum, half of the distance between homes (Per my attorney, the relocating parent generally bears the burden of transportation)
* summer visitation will be increased to three weeks from the previous two and will be exclusive of trip to FL to visit my parents
* Christmas “switch” will be on Dec 27 henceforth to allow for travel time during holidays— we are planning to go to FL for Christmas this year and in 2021
* timely and appropriate communication will occur between adults, m will not be involved in adult conversations or decisions until such time as it is appropriate for her to be brought in to those conversations
* academic expectations: m will maintain a minimum GPA of 3.2 at her new school, or circumstances may be deemed to be sufficient to bring her back to TN for school. I will need to have access to a parent portal for grades (if such exists), and behavior expectations, both in and out of school, shall be agreed upon by parents and child.

As I stated on the phone, i have been advised that all of my requests are reasonable. You and I have 20 days to reach an agreement regarding the move, and I would like to make these additions/amendments to the plan so that we can both move on.
However, i do believe that it is best to have these things legally and in writing.

---

So i've raised her, from kindergarten all the way through 8th grade, and now, NOW, she wants more time. now that i'm remarried, and moving down the road, she wants to fight. she told me "2019 is gonna be a hell of a year for you".

well, she's over $14k behind in child support, and in spite of having to share me with a stepmom and a stepdaughter, she's ready to move. and she doesn't want anything changed. i am in a good place, legally, but i am still loathe to fight this woman. i just want her to move away, or relinquish this haphazard attempt at pleasing her dad, or her new husband, or whatever game she's trying to play.

m sees right through it.

20190118

The song I settled on for the day. Also: turns out my daughter is like her mom. It's become a problem.

20181110

We made love all night. Literally all night. When you make someone come over twenty times, what more can you say?

We also watched Jerry McGuire and LHotP, but mainly lots of lovin’. And more lovin’. And more. And more. Until the sun was up.

20181016

status update!

- kid's birthday was good, immediate family showed, did it at logan's per her request, i ate the rest of the costco chocolate cake over the next few days. emphasis on few.
- family reunion was also good. wife could not be there because we mixed up the dates and she had to work. brought my daughters. my stepdaughter wants to start calling me dad. this is incredible.
- my wife's job is not going too well, they hired a new boss and he sucks.
- took my wife and girls to a high school football game and it was like the high school date i never had. with takis.
- i love my family and am excited for my future for the first time in a long time.

20180902

always loved this one. The kind of song I strive to write.



If a picture paints a thousand words,
Then why can't I paint you?
The words will never show the you I've come to know.
If a face could launch a thousand ships,
Then where am I to go?
There's no one home but you,
You're all that's left me too.
And when my love for life is running dry,
You come and pour yourself on me.

If a man could be two places at one time,
I'd be with you.
Tomorrow and today, beside you all the way.
If the world should stop revolving spinning slowly down to die,
I'd spend the end with you.
And when the world was through,
Then one by one the stars would all go out,
Then you and I would simply fly away

20180824

the most in love, the happiest, the most wonderful, the most amazing moments in my life. thank you god. thank you for answered prayers.

Die Antwort auf mein Gebete.

20180821

No one sleeps! No one sleeps!
Even you, oh princess, in your cold room,
look at the stars that tremble with love
and hope!

But my mystery; it is locked in me.
And my name,no one will know!
No, no! On your mouth
I will say it, when the light will shine!

And my kiss will break the silence,
that makes you mine!

His name no one will know...
And we shall have, alas, to die, to die...!

Disperse, o night!
Vanish, oh stars!
Vanish, oh stars!

At daybreak, I will win!
I will win!
I will win!

20180712

so we got our marriage license yesterday. i'm beyond excited for this new journey with my best friend.

so many things have happened that i feel like i need an entire day to write them all down. she has jogged my memories, and many of those PTSD-locked memories have come back to me, for better or worse.

my long term memory is on the way back as well.

also, turns out i'm a sex god. who knew?

we make each other feel like a million bucks. she is incredibly giving, in so many ways, that i feel like i've won the lottery. she is truly the one that got away... until now. :)

but anyway, without further adieu:

ajax diner. square books. did she say yes. chicken on a stick. waiting. the ranch. stargazer lilies. genghis grill. purple orchids and chef coats. iphone screens. j.lohr cabernet. iconic. chicken wings and bc powder. goodwill and kroger shopping cart rides. tommy boy. crab legs. all you can eat crab legs. catholic mass. arkabutler scenic route. better off dead (i want my $2). girl nights and face masks. ballerina tea. the hickory ridge mall. austin powers. durchfall. ukuleles and nails. einbildung and psychosomatic. he chose... poorly. brock vs ink. immune booster. my fellow americans. the pancake shop. mississippi corn. sex god and sex goddess. space cowboys. wildebeest hangman. rotisserie chicken. frasier. balls and boobies ultrasounds. zombie washing machine. the bucket list. 1 corinthians 13. west clinic selfies. cracklin oatbran. grown ups. ice cream cones. 5'10" and chocolate chunk. jagerschnitzel. cinnamon fire. crippled inside. banana bread and kerry gold. master jewelers rings on 7/7. the y. hickeys at the y. hickey firsts. weird science. fruity pebbles. vince at lafayettes. ms pacman laundromat. marriage license! verlobter. stand by me. birthday cards and maracas. reddi whip. proposing to my best friend. she said yes!

20180703

2018, where even the lows are pretty damn high. Asked her to marry me. She said yes. She wants simple. I love her. We do have issues but they’re not warning signs: they’re me throwing off the vestiges of old p. The p of fear is no me.

This makes me want to document some of my 2018 a little better. When it’s going great, I have a tendency to not write. I will work on that.

20180607

everything is going according to plan.

except for the blurry vision and groin tightness. tomorrow will tell.

current mood. seu jorge covering bowie.